Written on Mar, 30, 2012 by in | Leave a comment

As Santorum called Obama a nigga, I can rest a little easier now.  I don’t have to fear the tyranny he would rain down upon the citizens of this nation.  GET THE FUCK OUTTA MY UTERUS YOU MOTHERFUCKER YOU. Sorry, I’m getting the look. I’m not getting started. I haven’t talked about work in awhile.  So we hire this chic …

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Written on Mar, 15, 2012 by in | 1 Comment.

When you don’t post for 3+ months, what is there to say really?  Just avoid the topic, divert and move on. Entirely too much information combined with entirely too much free time to marinate in it all serves no one well. Did you know aloe plants bloom?  I didn’t.  The only aloe plant to survive the ice storms of 2010 …

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Written on Nov, 22, 2011 by in , , | 1 Comment.

If you know me, you know I love the library.  I’m totally at peace there. Yes, even with the creepy guy touching himself.  Yes, even with the sour smelling homeless. I like to walk around and see what title/cover calls to me.  Today a book spine spoke to me in a voice gritty with lust.  Pulled it from the shelf …

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Written on Nov, 22, 2011 by in | Leave a comment

You ever move a full bucket?  Full of water, full of feed, full of whatever – you’re focusing on the wrong part of the story. You get about halfway to your destination and you feel a slight slip.  It’s heavy but you got it, you’re cool. Maybe you recognize the sweat covering your hands.  Maybe you don’t.  Matters not either …

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Written on Nov, 09, 2011 by in | Leave a comment

I pay $160 a month in tolls. I’ll give you all a moment to absorb the magnitude of that.  One hundred and sixty American dollars in a longstanding recession that borders on wash out your Ziploc bags and aluminum foil depression. The tollway has two lanes.  An EZ-tag lane, for me, the suckas paying $160 a month.  The other being …

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Written on Nov, 02, 2011 by in , | Leave a comment

First, let’s give out props mkay.  You like my new digs?  Parajunkee hooked me up and I just love it! Second, we had a great Halloween.  That is, until the racist neighbor made an appearance. He came over with his kid and his skank and immediately went into how he snatched his child from daycare, his 13 month old, because …

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Written on Sep, 06, 2011 by in , | 2 Comments.

True Blood!  tisk-tisk-tisk  I’m one more disappointing episode from turning my back.  Now, that’s not to say I won’t miss my beloved viking, my most sexy Eric Northman, but you have forced my hand True Blood.  The last few episodes have been complete fucking garbage and when Eric and Bill BOTH dropped to their knees for Sookie, all I could …

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Written on Aug, 05, 2011 by in | Leave a comment

Alright kids, get ready, we’re going all the way down to the soft marrow this time.  We’re going to the most tender of tender of places. Yeh-yeh-yeh, it’s been awhile, I know.  You’ll understand soon enough. So here’s the thing.  I’ve been thinking a lot lately which is not something I’m known to do on a regular (blonde and all) …

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Written on Jul, 20, 2011 by in | Leave a comment

There is not a day that goes by that I’m not thankful to be so damned lucky to have married a man.  Not a pussassmotherfucker frontin’ like a man.  No.  A real man.  A man who isn’t afraid of work or dirt or bugs.  A man who does the uncomfortable tasks so that I don’t have to in order to …

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Written on Jun, 21, 2011 by in | 1 Comment.

So I’m watching Tosh.0 and he’s got this dude on there talking about how he’s a master.  A master in the art of making sweet love to a woman’s most private of areas with his mouth. You get what I’m saying here … Well, I’m half paying attention, surfing the interwebz, until I hear him say, “Well, the longest is …

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